Reviews

The emotional well-being of our nation's boys only seems to become a topic when a television news reporter breaks in with a grisly report of a playground or high school commons area that has been littered with spent shell casings and the bodies of a certain boy's classmates. Kindlon, a leading researcher and member of the Harvard University faculty for the past 15 years, and Thompson, a preeminent child psychologist who lectures widely on the development of boys, bring more than 35 years of experience working with these youngsters. The authors attempt to answer the basic question: "What do boys need that they are not getting?" They identify social and emotional challenges that boys face growing up male; debunk outdated theories on "mother blame," "boy biology," and "testosterone"; and make a passionate and compelling case that emotional literacy is the most valuable gift that we can offer our sons. Highly recommended.ÄMarty D. Evensvold, Arkansas City P.L., KS Copyright 2000 Cahners Business Information.

A genuine enthusiasm for their subject shines through the pages of this enormously compelling book, as the authors share insights on boys' emotional development from birth through the college yearsÄan increasingly high-profile topic in the wake of disheartening statistics about adolescent suicide and violence. In much the same way that Reviving Ophelia offered new models for raising girls, therapists Kindlon and Thompson argue that boys desperately need a new standard of "emotional literacy," showing how our culture's dominant masculine stereotypes shortchange boys and lead them toward emotional isolation. The authors turn a spotlight on the inner lives of boys, debunking preconceptions about gender, explaining the importance of nurturing communication skills and empathy in boys as well as girls, and steering boys toward a manhood of emotional attachment, not stoicism and solitude. They also challenge the ways in which, in their view, traditional school environments put boys at a disadvantage (why not hold off on reading instruction a year or two? they ask; why not five short recesses a day?). Such issues as drinking, drugs and the "culture of cruelty" among adolescents, in which "anything a boy says or does can and will be used against him," also meet with sensitive treatment. Separate chapters examine the relationships between fathers and sons and mothers and sons, and show how these can be protected and redefined. This thoughtful book is recommended for parents, teachers or anyone with a vested interest in raising happy, healthy, emotionally whole young men. Agent, Gail Ross of Lichtman, Trister, Singer and Ross. (Apr.)