A practical guide to spotting, avoiding, and outsmarting people with high-conflict personality disorders, from an expert in conflict management and mediation.
BILL EDDY is the co-founder and president of the High Conflict Institute, a company devoted to helping individuals and organizations deal with high-conflict people. Eddy is a Certified Family Law Specialist and Senior Family Mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center in San Diego. He is also a Licensed Clinical Social worker with twelve years' experience providing therapy to children, adults, couples and families in psychiatric hospitals and outpatient clinics. He has taught negotiation and mediation and currently serves on the faculty of the Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution at the Pepperdine University School of Law.
"[This] brilliant book on high-conflict personalities saves us
from trusting the wrong people and making the worst relationship
mistakes at work, at home, and in our lives. You need this
information today!"--Randi Kreger, bestselling author of Stop
Walking on Eggshells and The Essential Family Guide to Borderline
Personality Disorder
"5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life is a must read for the
average person dealing with a high-conflict individual at home
or at work. It is also essential reading for counselors, lawyers,
judges, mediators, physicians, and virtually all other helping
professionals."--Nancy Van Dyken, author of Everyday
Narcissism
“Essential. Entertaining. Easy. If you’ve ever been the deer
in the searchlight, frozen by excessive language or wildly
inappropriate actions, this book is your lifesaver. Just one high
conflict person in your life can steal your peace of mind for
years. With memorable acronyms, readable prose, and clear examples,
you can know exactly what to do to get back to safety. I may lend
my copy, I may buy 10 copies for people I love, but I will not give
my copy away. I’m keeping it as my get-out-of-trouble free
guide.”--Anne Katharine, author of Boundaries in an Overconnected
World
"Must. Read. The beauty of this much-needed book by Bill Eddy lies
in its elegant simplicity, its specific and straightforward
approach to understanding, identifying, and defusing high-conflict
behavior. Bill's anecdotes, sample statements, and easy-to-remember
techniques show readers how to protect themselves, set boundaries,
and communicate limits, all with compassion and
respect.”--Kimberlee Roth, co-author, Surviving A Borderline
Parent: How to Heal Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries, and
Self-Esteem
"Bill Eddy, where were you when I needed you? I had never heard of
a person with a high-conflict personality, but I spent years as a
target of blame. If I had had your illuminating book 5 Types
of People Who Can Ruin Your Life, I would have understood, and I
would have had tools and strategies for protecting
myself. This book will help loads of people recognize,
avoid, or manage the disturbing experience of being caught in the
net of a person with a high-conflict personality. I love the
book!"--Jean Illsley Clarke, bestselling author of Self-Esteem: A
Family Affair and co-author of Growing Up Again and How Much Is Too
Much?
"This book is full of easy-to-take-in information about high
conflict personalities, and lots and lots of actionable tips. If
you want to know HOW to stand up for yourself, and exactly WHAT to
do, this book is for you. With case studies, short scripts to
follow, and action steps, you're all set for managing the
high-conflict individual in your life. Just be sure you do take
action!"--Catherine Mattice Zundel, HR Consultant at Civility
Partners, author of BACK OFF! Your Kick-Ass Guide to Ending
Bullying at Work
"A deeply wise, much-needed, and extremely readable analysis of the
five kinds of high-conflict personalities. If there is an HCP in
your life, this invaluable book can help you stay sane in the midst
of the pain and chaos they create."--Resmaa Menakem, MSW, author of
Rock the Boat and My Grandmother's Hands
“What a terrific resource and reference book. This self-help manual
will assist readers in dealing with destructive personalities in a
positive way. This is a must read for everyone, and particularly
for those in professions dealing with high-conflict personalities
on a regular basis. What I love about it is that it is simple,
clear and easy to remember—really a step by step guide in how to
deal with destructive personalities in order to avoid causing them
more distress and how to escape becoming their victim.”-- Susan P.
Finlay, Judge of the Superior Court, ret., San Diego,
California
“Like so many of Bill Eddy’s past books, so useful, practical and
easy to read, this book will change your life. Having a personal
relationship with a high-conflict person, who can be a serial
relationship killer, is a scenario destined to ruin your life. This
book is a comprehensive ‘how to’ protect yourself by understanding
how high conflict persons act and behave and how to disengage in
ways design to protect those persons who have been
targeted.”--Sheldon E. Finman, Esq., family law attorney
“Bill Eddy translates for everyone the wisdom he's shared with
lawyers, therapists, judges, human resource directors and other
professionals about how to deal with highly challenging
personalities we encounter in our daily lives. By providing us with
proven techniques for handling people with these psychological
disorders, Bill helps save us from months and years of frustration,
heartache and agony.”-- Dennis L. Sharp, Esq., LL.M, Mediator,
Sharp Resolutions
“We have all encountered high-conflict personalities—in our
personal lives, at work, and in our neighborhoods. 5 Types of
People Who Can Ruin Your Life provides the reader with both a
blueprint and the necessary tools to successfully survive these
challenging people. We can’t change their personalities, but with
this book we can learn how to effectively manage them.”--Denis
Doyle, Ph.D., Retired Superintendent of Schools
“Bill Eddy has written an excellent common sense guidebook that
provides behavioral maps of what is going on and what can be done
about it. The heart of 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life is
the gift of a better future that it offers all of us who struggle
with high-conflict personalities.”--John Dennis
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