Table of Contents

Foreword – Laurie Penny
Introduction – Kitty Stryker
IN THE BEDROOM
Sex and Love When You Hate Yourself and Don’t Have Your Shit Together – JoEllen Notte
The Legal Framework of Consent Is Worthless – AV Flox
The Political Is Personal: A Critique of What Popular Culture Teaches About Consent (and How to Fix It) – Porscha Coleman
IN THE SCHOOL
Rehearsing Consent Culture: Revolutionary Playtime – Richard M. Wright
The Power of Men Teaching Men – Shawn D. Taylor
The Green Eggs and Ham Scam – Cherry Zonkowski
IN THE JAIL
Responding to Sexual Harms in Communities: Who Pays and Who Cares? – Alex Dymock
The Kids Aren’t All Right: Consent and Our Miranda Rights – Navarre Overton
Just Passing By – Roz Kaveney
IN THE WORKPLACE
“Ethical Porn” Starts When You Pay for It – Jiz Lee
There’s No Rulebook for This – Tobi Hill-Meyer
Service with a Smile Is Not Consent – Cameryn Moore
IN THE HOME
Consent Culture Begins at Home – Eve Rickert and Franklin Veaux
Bodily Autonomy for Kids – Akilah S. Richards
To Keep a Roof Over my Head, I Consented to Delaying my Transition – Laura Kate Dale
IN THE HOSPITAL
Giving Birth When Black – Takeallah Rivera
Fatphobia and Consent: How Social Stigma Mitigates Fat Women’s Autonomy – Virgie Tovar
Wrestling with Consent (and Also Other Wrestlers) – Jetta Rae
IN THE COMMUNITY
Games, Role-Playing, and Consent – Kate Fractal
Trouble, Lies, and White Fragility: Tips for White People – Cinnamon Maxxine
Sleeping with Fishes: A Skinny Dip into Sex Parties – Zev Ubu Hoffman
Sex Is a Life Skill: Sex Ed for the Neuroatypical – Sez Thomasin
Afterword – Carol Queen

About the Author

Kitty Stryker is a writer, activist and authority on developing a consent culture in alternative communities. She is the founder of ConsentCulture.com, a hub for LGBT, kinky and polyamorous folks looking for a sex critical approach to relationships, and one of the first people to talk about what a consent culture was and could be. Kitty is the editor of Ask: Building Consent Culture. She co-founded the arty sexy party Kinky Salon London, as well as creating the award-winning Ladies High Tea and Pornography Society. Head of cosplay for queer gaming convention GaymerX, Kitty currently spends a lot of her copious free time playing tabletop role-playing games with her two cats in Oakland, CA. She identifies as an anarchist, asexual, and sober, and while she sometimes serves her community as a street medic, she's happiest drinking tea and reading Emma Goldman to her small garden.

Reviews

"Ask is a good and definitely past-due read extending the idea of consent beyond the 'yes means yes' framework, with pieces exploring, in various ways, what it means to create consent cultures in a world that is overwhelmingly coercive." Reina Gattuso, feministing.com

"Like you, I have good intentions. Like you, I know some things about consent. But I thought I knew a lot more. And if there's one successful barometer of a book like this, it's how many 'a-ha' moments it contains. If you're anything like me you will find a lot of them in this book--some enlightening and pleasurable, many more uncomfortable and several downright horrific, especially as you realise your own crimes and also how many times your own consent has been violated. But you've got to start somewhere and that somewhere is here." Louisa Leontiades, thebodyisnotanapology.com

"This is not a handbook, but a wonderful guide that suggests new ideas about social awareness and responsibility." Claire Foster, Foreword Reviews

"The collection will prove a useful addition to the toolkit for those who are working towards not just towards sexual equality, but equity in all areas of public life." Sofia Kaufman, michigandaily.com

"As Kitty Stryker, an anti-fascist activist, queer sex educator, and frequent writer on the topic of consent notes in the introduction to Ask , 'Most books I found about rape culture and consent were written by and for middle-class, white, cisgender women.' She was determined to bring together one that centered trans and non-binary writers of color. But the book is not only inclusive in its authorship, it's also expansive in it's coverage of the multiplicity of contexts in which consent is importantmost of which are typically overlooked. The anthology, which was published by Thorntree Press in late October, includes 'Fatphobia and Consent: How Social Stigma Mitigates Fat Women's Autonomy' by Virgie Tovar, 'Giving Birth When Black' by Takeallah Rivera, 'The Kids Aren't All Right: Consent and Our Miranda Rights' by Navarre Overton, and 27 other essays that range in setting from sex parties to the service industry. At a time when every conversation seems to be about consent (or lack thereof, rather), it's a collection that actually adds to the discussion in crucial ways, and would prove enriching even to those who consider themselves pros at discussing sex, consent, and feminism." Sarah Burke, broadly.vice.com

" Foreword Review 's 2017 INDIES winner: honorable mention for women's studies." www.forewordreviews.com