Contents
Preface
Introduction: Why? When? Where? Who? What? and How?
Why?
Living by certain tried-and-proven standards is the best route to
personal happiness as well as to a stable and productive
society.
When?
Values should be taught to children of all ages -- with differing
agendas and changing emphasis as children mature.
Where?
Values are best taught in the home.
Who?
Parents are the crucial exemplars and instructors.
What?
Each parent must decide which values to teach. This book is a menu
from which to choose and a teaching system that will help with
whatever values parents select.
How?
There are some methods especially well suited to teaching values to
preschoolers. Other methods work best for elementary ages, and
still others are effective for adolescents.
VALUES OF BEING
Month 1: Honesty
...with other individuals, with institutions, with society, with
self...the inner strength and confidence that is bred by exacting
truthfulness, trustworthiness, and integrity
Month 2: Courage
...daring to attempt difficult things that are good...strength not
to follow the crowd, to say no and mean it and influence others by
it...being true to convictions and following good impulses, even
when they are unpopular or inconvenient...boldness to be outgoing
and friendly
Month 3: Peaceability
...calmness, peacefulness, serenity...the tendency to try to
accommodate rather than argue...the understanding that differences
are seldom resolved through conflict and that meanness in others is
an indication of their problem or insecurity and thus of their need
for your understanding...the ability to understand how others feel
rather than simply reacting to them...control of temper
Month 4: Self-Reliance and Potential
...individuality...awareness and development of gifts and
uniqueness...taking responsibility for own actions...overcoming the
tendency to blame others for difficulties...commitment to personal
excellence
Month 5: Self-Discipline and Moderation
...physical, mental, financial self-discipline...moderation in
speaking, in eating, in exercising...the controlling and bridling
of one's own appetites...understanding the limits of body and
mind...avoiding the dangers of extreme, unbalanced viewpoints...the
ability to balance self-discipline with spontaneity
Month 6: Fidelity and Chastity
...the value and security of fidelity within marriage and of
restraint and limits before marriage...the commitments that go with
marriage and that should go with sex...a grasp of the long-range
(and widespread) consequences that can result from sexual amorality
and infidelity
VALUES OF GIVING
Month 7: Loyalty and Dependability
...to family, to employers, to country, church, schools, and other
organizations and institutions to which commitments are
made...support, service, contribution...reliability and consistency
in doing what you say you will do
Month 8: Respect
...for life, for property, for parents, for elders, for nature, and
for the beliefs and rights of others...courtesy, politeness, and
manners...self-respect and the avoidance of self-criticism
Month 9: Love
...individual and personal caring that goes both beneath and beyond
loyalty and respect...love for friends, neighbors, even
adversaries...and a prioritized, lifelong commitment of love for
family
Month 10: Unselfishness and Sensitivity
...becoming more extra-centered and less self-centered...learning
to feel with and for others...empathy, tolerance, brotherhood,
sensitivity to needs in people and situations
Month 11: Kindness and Friendliness
...awareness that being kind and considerate is more admirable than
being tough or strong...the tendency to understand rather than
confront...gentleness, particularly toward those who are younger or
weaker...the ability to make and keep friends...helpfulness,
cheerfulness
Month 12: Justice and Mercy
...obedience to law, fairness in work and play...an understanding
of natural consequences and the law of the harvest... a grasp of
mercy and forgiveness and an understanding of the futility (and
bitter poison) of carrying a grudge
Postscript
HOMEBASE: a national organization of parents who share common
concerns, ideas, and objectives as well as values. What the
organization is and how to get involved
Index
Richard and Linda Eyre are writers, educators, and public speakers on topics such as parenting, life-balance, and family-strengthening. They have spoken before the American Bar Association, the AARP, the American Dental Association, executives at Fortune 100 Companies like Disney and Merck, and many more. Richard and Linda are the authors of more than two dozen books, including How to Talk to Your Child About Sex, Empty-Nest Parenting, The Entitlement Trap, Teaching Your Children Joy, and the #1 national bestseller Teaching Your Children Values.
This successful abridgment of the recent book ( LJ 3/15/93) focuses on 12 values that parents should encourage in their children: honesty, courage, peaceability, self-reliance, self-discipline, chastity and fidelity, loyalty, respect, love, unselfishness, kindness, and justice. Using a value-of-the-month approach, the Eyres clarify each concept with spirited examples from their lives. Suitable methods of instruction, such as games, family discussions, and awards, are explained, and suggestions for selecting techniques appropriate for preschoolers, elementary-age children, and adolescents are included. Read with warmth by the authors, this program should be made available to parents in most public libraries.-- Linda Bredengerd, Hanley Lib., Univ. of Pittsburgh, Bradford, Pa.
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